


Demisexual

by KokoScripsit



Category: omegaverse - Fandom
Genre: Asexuality Spectrum, F/F, Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Polyamory Negotiations, Queer Themes, guess I'm on my own, wow the fandom and character tags were so weird to type
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-30
Updated: 2020-01-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:48:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22471324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KokoScripsit/pseuds/KokoScripsit
Summary: Since high school, Snežana had gotten the feeling that she was justdifferentfrom everybody else, when it came to being interested in potential partners. And being an adult in college, with roommates who'd ended up becoming her best friends, didn't help at all...
Relationships: Original Female Character/Original Female Character/Original Female Character
Comments: 1
Kudos: 21





	Demisexual

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Your Guide To The Gender Trinary](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18501283) by [centreoftheselights](https://archiveofourown.org/users/centreoftheselights/pseuds/centreoftheselights). 



> This is the first of what's probably going to end up being a number of OC fics springboarding off of the worldbuilding that [centreoftheselights](https://archiveofourown.org/users/centreoftheselights/pseuds/centreoftheselights) did for her "Dismantle the Gender Trinary" series, because my muses insisted on discussing asexuality in this world and she was nice enough to tell me I could several months ago. This one turned out to be an introduction of sorts; more characters, more backstory, and more ace-spectrum orientations are going to be coming.
> 
> Pronunciation guide for the characters names, for those who don't know what all the markings on the letters mean:  
>  **Snežana** \- "Sneh-zha-na," the "ž" is pronounced like the S in "treasure." In her native Serbian, it means "snowy."  
>  **Luminița** \- "Loo-mee-neet-sa," the "ț" is pronounced like the TS in "prints." In her native Romanian, it means "little light."  
>  **Era** \- "Eh-rah," like the E in "elbow" + "rah." (I bother explaining because I understand that some dialects of English pronounce the identically-spelled English word as "ee-rah," which she would have spelled "ira" if she was going for that sound.) In her native Albanian, it means "the wind."

For the longest time, Snežana really didn't know what to do.

She had had long, spirited conversations over the phone with her twin sister, seeking advice from the one person who knew her better than anyone else. She had lain awake at night, fretting over possibilities. And still, she wasn't sure what the right thing to do could be.

The problem was that she seemed to have fallen for her roommates. Since she was an alpha rooming with a beta and an omega, other people might have _expected_ this to happen, but the situation was more complicated than that. Because Snežana seemed to like people all wrong—both too easy, some said, and too slow—and because her roommates brought their own complications to the table. She couldn't just start _liking_ them now _—_ it would be like betraying them—

She had met Luminița in the classes required for their shared minor. While they were studying different majors—mechanical engineering for Snežana, computer science for Luminița—they were both minoring in electrical engineering, so their coursework overlapped sometimes. They worked effectively together in class, and it wasn't too bad when they clashed despite their both having personalities that others liked to describe as “difficult,” so it had made sense to move into an apartment together at the beginning of the subsequent semester. At the time, it just hadn't _mattered_ that Luminița was an omega.

And if Snežana was perfectly honest with herself... it _still_ didn't matter. She didn't _care_ that alphas like herself were expected to seek out omega mates for impersonal reasons. Sure, she was aware of the facts, but after all she'd put herself through, she was fairly confident that that wasn't what was driving her newfound interest in her roommate. It was... the everything else. She was confident that she wouldn't feel any differently even if Luminița had been another alpha. It was that this was _Luminița,_ her best friend. Luminița, who snarked right back when Snežana got harsh. Luminița, who went to the Greek Orthodox church six blocks away with her every Sunday, and they stuck out a little because they were the only regular attendees who weren't Greek but they did it together. Luminița, who could make the computer do things that as far as Snežana knew shouldn't even be possible. 

Luminița, whose opinion _mattered_ to her.

And it was only worse to think of what she might do to the late-come third member of their household. She and Era _really_ hadn't gotten along in high school, coming into an astonishing number of conflicts considering that they were two years apart and by all rights shouldn't even have _seen_ that much of each other. But after Snežana had graduated and gone away to college, someone had betrayed Era's trust, and the younger woman had turned up on a park bench, distraught and dirty and smelling like she had an alpha mate. Snežana and Luminița had found her on their way home from church, and some kindness (particularly from Luminița) had elicited the information that she had been trapped into a relationship she didn't want, by an alpha who hadn't cared enough to listen when she told him no. And while Snežana didn't exactly come off as a bleeding-heart type at first glance, she was far more easily moved than anyone seemed to expect, and willingly agreed to Luminița's suggestion that Era stay with them.

She hadn't expected to feel much more than compassion for the beta who had joined them. Era had come away from what had happened with fragile places and sharp edges, neither of which Snežana particularly wanted to bump into, but the longer she stayed, the more there seemed to be to like about her. The mordant humor that meshed so well with the other two women's. The nearly paradoxical gentleness she showed when someone was hurt—and for that matter, how _effortless_ she seemed to find kindness when it was really needed, like it was the most natural thing in the world to find someone bleeding and put them back together without judgment. Even the way that she would disappear for a while after social events and eventually turn out to be hiding out on the roof, or in a tree, or in a blanket fort cleverly constructed on the top shelf of the linen closet where it wouldn't be immediately obvious that it was anything except a pile of blankets, was becoming more and more endearing. It was all just part of who Era was, and who she was... was good, and Snežana absolutely _did not_ want to ruin the safety she had found here.

Snežana understood well enough what role her alphahood played in all this. Era had been abused by an alpha, so shortly before coming here that it had been _months_ before the scent of his claim started to wear off. It was laughably unlikely that she would have been willing to stay in the same home as another alpha who was attracted to her so soon—but Snežana hadn't been, then. Why did that have to _change?_ It wasn't like she wanted to be a threat, and she wasn't sure if Era would still see her as one.

So she was stuck feeling like a dog chasing her own tail in circles, her own feelings betraying her and nothing could help.

Until she found it: a word, a single [wonderful|terrible] word that might just explain everything.

vvv

“Hey, are you still with us, or did you die while we weren't looking?” Luminița joked, pulling Snežana back to reality.

“I regret to inform you that you will need a different excuse to make funeral bread,” Snežana intoned solemnly in reply. 

Luminița snorted softly—it was a familiar joke between them—but Era piped up as well.

“You really have been acting different lately. Is something wrong?”

“Wrong?” Snežana shook her head. “No... I just figured something out about myself.”

“Do you want to share this distracting discovery,” Luminița teased, “or does it need more time first?”

That was probably the best opening she was ever going to get. “I should tell you... I'm pretty sure I'm demisexual.”

It was the first time she had ever said it aloud, and as strange and vulnerable as it felt to say the words, it also felt right. In both good and bad ways, it _did_ feel like she was putting the truth about herself out in front of her friends.

“Demisexual? What does that mean?” Era asked, leaning forward. Which, for as nerve-wracking as it was to hear, was also a hopeful sign. She didn't look upset or judgmental, just curious.

“It's a kind of asexual,” Snežana explained. “It's not that I don't _ever_ like people ‘that way,’ but... I have to like them in other ways—as friends— _first_.” When neither objected, she continued, “Some demisexual people get crushes on _all_ their close friends, or close enough to it, just as a side effect of being demi.”

“Are you like that?” Era wanted to know, her tone still gentle.

Snežana took a deep breath. “Yes. You two are my best friends, and I want you to be happy, so this doesn't have to mean anything for you if you don't want—”

She was cut off by Luminița's lips against hers. For a moment, she didn't quite understand what was going on, until her brain caught up to what the sweet, plush pressure against her lips was and she realized that she was herself reciprocating.

After a long, heart-stoppingly blissful moment, Luminița pulled back, a teasing grin spreading across her face. “How's that for a response?”

“I think I like this response very much,” Snežana replied, wondering if her light-headedness really was audible in her voice or if it was just a trick her own ears were playing on her.

That was one answer clear, but when she looked around Snežana was less immediately sure what Era was thinking, as the beta looked... indecisive, for a moment.

And then something hardened in Era's face, and she said, “I want to give it a try, being with you, but I need to be able to set some rules before I can.”

Snežana nodded. “What kind of rules do you need?”

Era softened, a little, at not being opposed, but a certain stubborn set remained in her manner as she said, “Nobody gets to _own_ me. I'm not a _thing_ you can possess, and I don't want to be talked about as if I were.”

“Of course not!” Luminița said.

“For you, I can do that,” agreed Snežana. “You're one of my best friends and a person in your own right. I'll be happy to fight anyone who tries to say otherwise. What else?”

For a moment, Era was quiet, before she said, “I need to be able to say _no_ to anything. If... if it gets to be too much, I have to be able to back out.”

“Always,” Snežana promised immediately. “You will _always_ have the option to say no. I don't ever want to do things that you don't like—and that goes for both of you.”

“And for you, too,” Luminița put in, laying her hand on Snežana's shoulder. “I don't want _you_ getting hurt if we can avoid it, either.”

Snežana looked over at Luminița with a smile. “I appreciate that.” She returned her gaze to Era. “Anything else?”

Era looked thoughtful for a moment, and then smiled. “That's all I can think of. Thank you, for listening to me.”

vvv

“So... demisexual, huh?” Era asked.

The three of them had set up on their living room floor, pillows and blankets spread out around them. Era lay on her stomach, chin resting on her folded arms, while Luminița was sprawled across a small mountain of pillows and Snežana reclined propped up on one elbow. It was a comfortable way to talk.

“Yeah.”

“Does that mean... have you had crushes before?”

Snežana sighed sadly. “Yes. They haven't always ended well, but I've had them.”

Luminița leaned forward a bit, looking worried. “What do you mean, ‘haven't ended well’?”

There was a moment's pause, before Era said, “Half your best friends in high school were other alphas, weren't they? Did they... not take it well?”

“Some of them better than others,” Snežana replied, grimacing. “Haris said he didn't know about alphas liking other alphas, but he did know about me, so he's still my friend. Florian was completely chill, to the point that I don't think that was the first time he'd heard that kind of thing. But John... never even found out I'd liked him. He flew off the handle after he overheard me talking to _Florian_ — called me disgusting and unnatural and... _older_ things.”

It was about then, as all three of them winced at the mention of ‘older things,’ that Snežana noticed that her hands were shaking, and she couldn't tell if it was with fear or anger. There had been a time, and one yet within living memory at that, when people had generally believed that to be other than alpha was to be _less_ than alpha; while those attitudes were fading, particularly with respect to omegas, the slurs that expressed them were still signs of potential danger for betas, omegas, and even alphas deemed to be too much like one of the other genders.

“I don't know what exactly he told everyone else,” Snežana continued, “but my cousin Nik hasn't spoken to me since.”

“Wait, was that John the guy you used to hang around all the time?” Era exclaimed. “Big dude, blond hair, quiet voice, kinda intimidating, had a thing for double-breasted trenchcoats?” At Snežana's confirming nod, she declared, “Well, that explains a _lot_.”

“What does it explain?” Luminița wanted to know, sitting up more or less straight.

“First — did this happen in the second half of March, in... I was in tenth grade, so you would have been in twelfth?”

Snežana started. “Why, yes — yes, it was.”

Era cursed softly. “I'm sorry. I can't believe it took me this long to figure it out, but... he liked to start fights.”

“Wait, but we were fighting long before he got mad at me—”

“That's why it took me so long to notice he was _always there_ when we argued! I figured you just hung out with him a lot — it was only after you'd had a fight with him and he started being meaner about you that it started being _remarkable_ for him to be around for it.”

“Did he... say things to you?”

“He said things _around_ me, at any rate,” Era clarified. “I don't remember anything specific he said, but I definitely remember that he would say _something_ and I would come away with the impression that you'd done something to offend me...”

Snežana growled a curse of her own. “He must have said such things around me as well, and I never even noticed. I thought he was my _friend_!”

“Of course you did,” Era pointed out. “He wanted you to think so. He might even have thought so too.”

Snežana stared at her for a long moment, then sighed and flopped onto her back like a deflating balloon. “Sometimes I wonder... what is _wrong_ with some people?”

“Only _sometimes_?” Luminița asked, sounding very skeptical.

“Well, _yeah,_ ” Snežana fired back, “I have to set _some_ time aside for things that don't have anything to do with those people, don't I?”

Era broke the brief silence that followed, with a soft snicker almost like a chirping cricket. And then Luminița joined in, chuckling almost musically, and then Snežana was caught up in it too with chortles that faded to giggles and then grew to bigger laughs again. And all three of them were laughing together, more to share their joy than because the joke was any good...

Yes, she really did love them, and somehow... maybe they loved her back.


End file.
